Best of 2010

So, I sat down before the year ended and tried to write one of my traditional year- end blogs, but I couldn’t do it. I had writers block. At first I thought I just wasn’t ready to write, as I have to be inspired and the mood has to hit. I ended up realizing that I had nothing I wanted to really write about. I had already written about ever thing I wanted to. What I have decided to do instead is a little different. I have compiled a list of my favorite things in 2010; from my favorite songs, to movies, my favorite album and my best moments of the year.

My favorite songs

I don’t know what I would do without Music in my life. It has always gotten me through the tough times, and it makes the good times that much better. Sometimes my favorite song of the moment can come on my iPod and brighten my day, that's all it takes! Here is a list of some of those songs I had on constant rotation this past year.

Train – Hey Soul Sister

Jason Derulo - In My Head

B.O.B feat. Haley Williams & Eminem – Airplanes Pt. 2

Taio Cruz – Dynamite

Usher – DJ Got Us Falling in Love

The Script – Breakeven

Lady Antebellum – Need You Now

La Roux – Bulletproof

Katy Perry – Teenage Dream

Flo Rida Ft. David Guetta – Club Can’t Handle Me

Mumford and Sons – Little Lion Man

The Reason – Longest Highway Home

Florence And The Machine – Dog Days Are Over

Eminem – Not Afraid

Brandon Flowers – Crossfire

Muse – Uprising

Nelly – Just A Dream

Linkin Park – The Catalyst

Finger Eleven – Living In A Dream

Arcade Fire – Ready to Start

My Favorite Movies

Get Him To The Greek - P Diddy is actually funny! Who knew?!

Inception

Easy A - So much better than I thought it would be!

Shutter Island- Completely Mind fucked

Scott Pilgram vs. the World

Kick- Ass - I just had no words for how killer that little girl was

The Social Network

The Kids Are All Right- Its great that movies like this can be made in America

Morning Glory - I love me some Rachel McAdams and her hot costar

Love and Other Drugs - Jake G's naked bum and Anne Hathaway awesomeness

Top movies of the year that I haven’t seen yet, but am sure I will love: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1, The Town , Toy Story 3, The Fighter, Black Swan

My Favorite Album of 2010

Taylor Swift – Speak Now

Say what you will about Taylor, it seems you either love her or hate her. I love her. I love seeing positive girls out there, actually being a good role model for the young ones. She’s a true songwriter. She tells stories of real life that people can really relate to. I can just say that with everything I have been through in the past year, I have never listened to an entire album that spoke to me more than “Speak Now.”

My Favorite Moments

Going to Las Vegas for the first time in January

Fitting 7 people into the Photo booth at the Drake in March

Watching NKOTB member Joey McIntyre seriously rocking out to Down With Webster during CMW

Apryl’s Bachelorette at Muzik – Gangsta’s Paradise

Getting birthday tattoos with Krista in May

Cousin Dallas coming to visit from Calgary in June

Dallas saving the precious goat Darla from a terrible fate, then learning Darla was pregnant

Watching the birth of those 2 little goats – I never need to see that again

Going on my first 7 day beach vacation with Jenny to Punta Cana in October

Concerts: Our Lady Peace, Adam Lambert, Bon Jovi and Hanson

My family Christmas – both of them

Ending the year in Montreal with Nat

Having good friends in my life: Natalie, Krista, Sandra & Paul – you all are my rock, whether you know It or not.

In my 2009 recap I said that I had grown that year more than any other. Well, it was the same for 2010. I went through a heck of a lot and I learned so much about life and about myself. I've got big plans this year and I have already made my action plan...and put some of those into motion. I can't wait to share all of my adventures with you.

xoxo

Insight Of The Day

"Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain.

The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life. What is it you would let go of today?"

Mary Manin Morrissey
Minister, Author and Speaker

A Touching Moment I Won't Forget

This past Saturday night I attended a 30th wedding anniversary for some family friends, Gary & Terri. At one point I was sitting at a table by myself drinking some water (trying to sober up...) when Gary came and sat down next to me. He thanked me for coming and then he just stared at Terri and said that he has been with Terri for 30 years and could be with her for another 20 years easy...he just loves being with her, so there is hope (for me). Next thing you know we'll be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary, I said that I would be there for that. He went on to say its just a chemistry you have with someone, him and Terri have it, and so do my parents. He then tells me that he really hopes that I find that with someone one day. After that he just got up and walked away leaving me sitting there with tears in my eyes. I can't tell you how much I needed to hear that. I will never forget it.

Xoxo

Insight Of The Day

"You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love."

Henry Drummond
1851-1897, Scientist and Author

Music Videos I Was In :)

I was reminded of this video I was in a couple years ago last night...and then magically today a girl who was also in the video posted it on Facebook today. So here it is!
Neverending White Lights - The World is Darker feat. Melissa Auf Der Maur

Now here is the Video I was in with some good friends of mine, Birds of Wales!

Too Many Thoughts

Do you ever have so many things on your mind and you don't know what to do with it?! I've been thinking about some serious things over the last week and I almost can't handle it anymore. My head feels like its going to explode. I need someone to talk to. The people that I should be able to turn to are not here at this moment. I want someone to magically make this feeling go away, but I know I'm the only one who can do that. I know this will all work out soon enough...hopefully how I am dreaming it will haha...but its a big pain in the ass right now!!!
xoxo

Adventures of finding Mr. Right

I feel like my search for the so called Mr. Right is never ending. It’s always the same story over and over again. Look boys, I’m not dumb, I’ve heard it all before. Every single story about why we can’t be together, yep, I’ve heard it. These are just excuses. The bottom line is “he’s just not that into you!” It does work both ways though, I may not be that into you either.

I’ve loved and been loved. So let’s start at the beginning. There was a guy who loved me like no other person ever has. He became an emotionally abusive drug addict who I am proud to report is healthy and happy now. There was a musician, another musician, an actor, a couple more actors after that, another musician….and a smattering of random people in between. Seeing a trend here?! Lucky for me I got over my musician and actor thing. I mean, I can’t say that guitar players are still not a weakness! Yummy!!! Many of those people listed there I did in fact meet online. We’re talking MySpace, LavaLife and Facebook. Some of them were through work and random outings in the city.

After a year of being out of the city and not meeting anyone, I decided I should maybe get back into the swing of things and start dating again. I mean how else am I going to meet my future husband? It’s not like one day there will be a knock at the door and Mr. Right is standing there with a bouquet of flowers (only in my dreams). And, let’s talk about something for a sec, where is the romance? I for one have never experienced that in my life. Little gestures, like giving flowers? Two people have ever given me flowers. Just saying.

Now once I realized nobody was gonna come knocking at my door, that’s where PlentyOfFish came in. I had no idea what I was in for. What an interesting and bumpy ride it has been.

Now let’s see if I can even remember everyone….first dude I met didn’t look a damn thing like his photos. I was so turned off when he walked up to me I thought I might vomit. Then I told myself I was being dumb and to smarten up and put a smile on. It did no good, the meeting lasted all of 15 minutes; not even his hot BMW could save it.

Second guy was alright, we had a nice conversation over dessert, but there was zero chemistry, he was too conservative, and he was about to go on vacation. This is where I should also mention that I have what I call a “Vacation Curse.” It’s happened so many times over the years. I’ll be dating someone, they will go away on vacation and I will never hear from them again. Let me see, it’s happened…too many times to count. It’s weird. It comes down to the fact that upon reflection, they decided that I’m not what they want or they are “too busy” for a relationship right now. Give me a break.

Third guy was a good guy I think. We spent a gorgeous summer day going for brunch, walking around High Park and the Waterfront. Again zero chemistry. There is also no way I would fit with his lifestyle. It was a lovely day though. After that I met someone who I dated for about a month. Chemistry was there and I think I got a little too excited that I finally found someone I could connect with. It didn’t take long to see his issues, they were loud and clear. Note to self: Don’t ever go for someone who isn’t over their ex. Turns out he had just gotten out of an over three year relationship. He turned into a royal jerk. I was so done with it. I really liked his mom though. Too bad.

On to the next! This guy swept me off my feet!!! He was everything the previous guy wasn’t. He did everything I had ever wanted a guy to do after we met. Too bad it only lasted about a week. There was about 3 dates in that week. He called. He text. He would say he couldn’t wait to see me. I just can’t believe I fell for it. Shame on me. Next thing you know he’s cancelling a date (I KNEW he would cancel…my super power intuition is dead on when it kicks in) and I never hear from him again. I took it unexpectedly hard. I couldn’t explain it. I still can’t really. It had only been a week and a half between the first date and the cancelled one. All I can say is there are some people who just get to you…and he just got to me.

It’s funny though, I was really hesitant to even go on the first date. I thought about cancelling it myself. It really bugged me that he was on POF more than any person I had ever seen. I knew that meant bad things for me. I don’t want serial daters. I don’t want someone who is always looking for the next best thing. That’s what is SO hard about online dating. There are so many people to choose from…right at your finger tips.

So what did I go and do after that guy? I said screw POF! It’s all serial daters, there are no serious people on here. I joined…now this is embarrassing…ugh…eHarmony. Don’t judge me lol! I have nothing more to say about that, other than it’s the biggest waste of money ever. I was actually insulted by my so called “matches.” I still have one more payment before I can cancel that sucker. Oi vey.

Well wouldn’t you know what happens not long after I join eHarmony in order to find someone who actually wants something lasting? I meet a guy from POF who actually looks at the whole thing the same way I do. He doesn’t go online when he is dating someone. One person at a time. I don’t know how true this turned out to be with me, but I for one stopped going on. I didn’t check my messages for over a month. It felt awesome.

This guy had many of the qualities that I am looking for, he was great to talk to, we agreed on many important things, had some things in common. But, I was never certain about him. We didn’t have that spark. After what happened to me before, I was beginning to wonder if my expectations were too high. Was it right of me to expect sparks instantly? I thought about many couples that I know, and some didn’t want to date when they met, some were friends for years and things like that. So I thought ok, maybe I should just go with the flow and see if this develops? It never did. I think we felt the same way the entire time. It took like 5 weeks for it to end though. I didn’t end it. He did…while I was on the hwy driving to his place. Needless to say I got off at the next exit.

Now here is where I have an issue. This is where I get pissed off. Stop lying to me. Stop making excuses. I don’t need to hear it. I may go along with what you are saying, but I know better. I got the same old story about being too stressed and just not being in the dating mindset. He also said that he made a promise to himself that he would have worked out these issues before he got into seeing someone again. SOOO how is it that the very next day he is on a dating site looking for someone new? I’m just annoyed because so many boys think I fall for their stories. I don’t. I do know better. Here’s the bottom line with this one, we just weren’t that into each other. Although, he was pretty awesome, I wish him the best.

The great thing is, I do learn from every experience. Every guy teaches me something new. As hard as it is at the time, I’m better for it.

For the record, I did realize that my expectations for a “spark” are not too high. Like my October issue of Cosmo says, “If there’s no spark, forget it. There needs to be a sizzle!” Hell ya!!!

So, will I ever meet my Mr.Right? I most certainly will.

To be continued….

Mine

Maybe one day.....I can dream.

Lyrics to Taylor Swifts new song, Mine

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh

You were in college, working part-time, waiting tables
Left a small town and never looked back
I was a flight risk, afraid of fallin'
Wondering why we bother with love, if it never lasts

I say, "Can you believe it?"
As we're lyin' on the couch
The moment, I can see it
Yes, yes, I can see it now

Do you remember, we were sittin' there, by the water?
You put your arm around me for the fist time
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Flash forward, and we're takin' on the world together
And there's a drawer of my things at your place
You learn my secrets and figure out why I'm guarded
You say we'll never make my parents' mistakes

But we got bills to pay
We got nothin' figured out
When it was hard to take
Yes, yes

This is what I thought about:

Do you remember, we were sittin' there, by the water?
You put your arm around me for the fist time
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Do you remember all the city lights on the water?
You saw me start to believe for the first time
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Oh, oh, oh, oh

And I remember that fight, two-thirty AM
You said everything was slipping right out of our hands
I ran out, crying, and you followed me out into the street

Braced myself for the goodbye, cause that's all I've ever known
Then, you took me by surprise
You said, "I'll never leave you alone."

You said, "I remember how we felt, sitting by the water.
And every time I look at you, it's like the first time.
I fell in love with a careless man's careful daughter.
She is the best thing that's ever been mine."

You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Do you believe it?
We're gonna make it now
And I can see it

I can see it now

Insight Of The Week

"A good laugh overcomes more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than any other one thing."

Laura Ingalls Wilder
1867-1957, Author

Teenage Dream

This is my official song of the summer, even though it came out towards the end. It's my favourite by far!

Insight Of The Week

"When you paint success pictures in your mind, you initiate an inner process whereby your attitudes, hopes, aspirations, and enthusiasm are elevated in response to an image of a more promising future. Every person who aspires must first sell themselves hope, the promise of a better life."

U.S. Andersen
1917-1986, Author of The Magic In Your Mind

I Promise Myself

A friend of mine posted this on Facebook the other day, and I liked it. So here it is.

xoxo

Adventures Of An Almost Camping Trip

Last weekend I was given the opportunity to get out of town (away from the G20 Summit) and head up north for some camping. Now, if you know me, you know I have never camped a day in my life. Pretty sure I could never even make it through a night in a tent in my own backyard when I was a kid. Well, I have grown up since then, and camping didn't sound at all like a bad idea to me. I felt like being adventurous.

To make this a little more spontaneous, I was not even at home when I was asked to go. In fact, I was laying poolside enjoying the sun with my mom and Nana. I had minimal things on me, so in order to go camping I ran to WalMart and spent a crap load on clothes and on everything I would need. I was having a blast! I mean I had never been camping, and to go for the first time unprepared?! My best friend had a good laugh at me. I believe her words were: "You? Camping??? Hahahaha!" Thanks! I love you too. haha.

To spare you all of the details, it rained. Hard. We decided not to camp after a 20 minute boat ride during a torrential downpour. I learned not to use the blue bag I had my clothes in as it turned my clothes blue when it got soaked. My hands were also blue. I looked like smurf. All I could do was laugh at my first attempt at camping. Despite the pouring rain, being soaked, and having blue dye everywhere, I was actually enjoying every minute of it.

Instead of just packing it in and going back to the city, 2 of us decided to stay at his mom's house (a very beautiful one I might add) on a nearby lake. The house was on Sturgeon Lake. This has meaning to me. My old family cottage was located on the exact same lake, and this is where I had spent many of my childhood summers. We drove through Bobcaygeon, the lovely, lovely Bobcaygeon. Just going through the town brought back so many memories. It was just how I remembered it. The locks where all of the boats would come in, my favourite candy store where they also had the best frozen yogurt...I was a little overwhelmed with emotion. I didn't realize what seeing this place again would do to me. I realized very quickly that I missed it. It had been about 10 years since I've been up there.

So, the weekend didn't turn out as planned whatsoever, but it was a great one. I really enjoyed being out of the city and somewhere so peaceful and relaxing. I definitely need to have that in my life again, even if that means just renting a cottage for the week. It's definitely worth it. So yes, I have made the decision that cottage life is going to be part of my life.

Maybe I'll even give camping another shot sometime! I'll just make sure there is no rain in the forecast first!

xoxo

Insight Of The Day

For the past several weeks I have been receiving "Insight of the Day" to my inbox from BobProctor.com. I really enjoy reading these every morning, so what I thought I would do here is post my favourite one from time to time. If you're unfamiliar with Bob Proctor, he is a contributor to The Secret (http://thesecret.tv/), author and leader in the Personal Development industry. In other words, he is amazing. Today, I am going to include a few on my favs since I have so many to choose from.

"Successful people decide how they are going to live; they are not victims of circumstance. In good times or bad times, they know where they are going and they know that they are going to get there."

Bob Proctor

"Don't concern yourself too much with how you are going to achieve your goal - leave that completely to a power greater than yourself. All you have to do is know where you're going. The answers will come to you of their own accord, and at the right time."

Earl Nightingale
1921-1989, Syndicated Radio Announcer and Author

"You must constantly ask yourself these questions: Who am I around? What are they doing to me? What have they got me reading? What have they got me saying? Where do they have me going? What do they have me thinking? And most important, what do they have me becoming? Then ask yourself the big question: Is that okay? Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change."

Jim Rohn
1930-2009, Author and Speaker

"Enthusiasm is one of the most powerful engines of success. When you do a thing, do it with all your mind. Put your whole soul to it. Stamp it with your own personality. Be active, be energetic, be enthusiastic and faithful, and you will accomplish your object. Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm."

Ralph Waldo Emerson
1803-1882, Essayist, Philosopher and Poet

At the end of next week, I'll post my new weekly favourite.

xoxo

The Perfect Summer Weekend

On weekends that we actually get perfect Summer weather, it's essential that we take advantage of it. So that is exactly what I did!

On Saturday I opened my brand new book, "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert, put on my bikini and went outside to read it. I never thought I would read this book, I mean I had seen it on book shelves for ages. But, when I saw Julia Roberts on Oprah last week talking about her role in the movie adaptation coming out in August, I was intrigued. Later in the show the author was also on and at that point I knew I needed to buy this book. I wanted to read about her year of self discovery in Italy (eat), India (pray) and Indonesia (love). I did exactly what they wanted me too! I am already hooked!

I made sure to slather on the SPF 30, but that wasn't good enough. I have some really weird looking burns! Welcome to Summer! haha

On Sunday I decided that it would be a perfect day to head to Toronto and go for a walk with some good company. That's one of things I miss most about living downtown, going for walks on beautiful sunny days. So we started out at a really nice little place in Bloor West Village (looooveee) for Brunch and then walked through the lovely High Park. We walked through the park until we were at the Lakeshore. So we got some ice cream and walked along the beach. I don't know who thinks its a good idea to swim in Lake Ontario?! But there was plenty of that going on!

My feet were sore and a little blistered by the end of the day, but I don't even care. These are the summer days that I live for.